Career Crossroads and Culture Shock

Fair warning, this post is not the most organized or well written. Welcome to my brain. 😊 It's been a while since I last posted!

Gare de sud bibliothèque - close to our current apartment

There are people who know exactly what they want to for work for the rest of their lives, and then there are the rest of us. I've never really been sure about what I want to do for my career. I even went into teaching after getting my bachelor's degree telling myself, "well, at least you got a degree in business so it shouldn't be too hard to find another job if you don't like teaching."

In one of my previous posts I talked about how I earned my TEFL and planned to teach English. I searched for jobs, applied for some, and was rejected due to my lack of experience in teaching English... as it turns out, most schools want teachers who have experience teaching English, not necessarily a native English speaker. The problem- I wasn't even upset about it. I wasn't even looking forward to anything throughout my job search. The truth is, I don't really want to teach anymore. I never really loved it. I'm sorry to any former students who might read this, but it's the truth. I loved the time I would spend learning more about photography, graphic design, publishing (yearbook) and it was nice making connections with some of my students... but I never loved it. It was just a job for me. Maybe it's because I didn't teach at the greatest school. Maybe it's because in general, teachers are overworked and underpaid. Every year, we would get a new responsibility that didn't really enhance the student experience in the classroom- just gave more work to teachers.

**Anyone who has shi* to say about teachers being overworked while having summers off, I don't want to hear it.**

So, I'm done teaching. For now at least.

Attended our first football match Nice vs some German team. It was crazy.

Everyone keeps asking me, "well what are you doing over in France??" so to answer that question ahead of time, I have a part-time job working from home doing freelance graphic design and e-mail marketing. I'm learning to speak French. I've been climbing at the bouldering gym. (and I might be strongest I've ever been as a climber right now) I've been cooking a ton. Baking a bit. But most importantly, just trying to enjoy myself and be happy living in a different part of the world.

We've officially lived in France for over a year. It took me a little more than half a year to get over the culture shock - particularly the fear of failing when speaking a new language. I felt like a complete outsider everywhere I went. I had this really strange fear of not wanting to be exposed.... for whatever reason, I didn't want people to know I was American?? I don't know why. It took a while, but I FINALLY got over it, and have been living comfortably as an expat.

There are certain things I've definitely come to love about France, and many things I miss about the United States. A lot of friends and family have asked me what my favorite thing is about the French culture. Rather than just name one thing, I decided to make a list. As I tend to do. 😊😂

Things I like about France	Things I don't like about France
The general work/life balance. Everyone values vacation and their time away from work. Most people leave work for the day and are DONE - they don't usually take their work home with them. In the U.S., nearly everyone I know has the idea that they must be working hard ALL the time. (And of course it's okay to be like that, I just never have been)	The prefecture and literally getting ANYTHING official done. We opted out of getting a car and our French drivers license partially because of this, and because we knew we wanted to go back to the U.S. at some point. It took us nearly a year to get our carte de sejour (residence permit) and we STILL haven't received our carte vitale (health insurance card)
​The love of food - especially desserts. Absolutely no shame in getting une glace (ice-cream/gelato) at any point in time throughout the day.	​The lack of Mexican food and breakfast food. And spicy food in general. I've learned how to make my own enchilada sauce and salsa to help with this.
The straightforwardness of the people. Of course, everyone has different personalities, but I feel like most people will tell you their honest opinion.	​The smoking. I listened to a podcast a couple of weeks ago that said "actually, people smoke more in the U.S. than they do in France" and I was immediately like... Pffff! Cigarette smoke wafts into my apartment from the street every day. Nolan and I were on the train the other day and saw some drunk guy smoking ON THE TRAIN? People smoke around children and babies all the time... 🤷🏽‍♀️
There is amazing, cheap pizza all over the place, and I've had the best falafel I've ever tasted here. Side note - people tend to get their own pizzas instead of sharing!! Love it. The crust is thinner so it's not like eating a whole American pizza.	​The late night partying. This is certainly because I'm too old for this now. I definitely can't keep up with most of our friends! They'll stay out until like 4 or 5 in the morning, and it's considered early when I decide to go home at 1 or 2 😂
​European architecture is beautiful.	This could just be a city thing in general, but the streets smell like piss and shi* nearly every day. Sometimes even when you immediately walk out of the apartment. It seems to get a bit better in cooler weather.
Best baguettes (and maybe butter) in the world.	While the cheese is good, I'm a fan of cheddar and there isn't a lot of good cheddar here... I also haven't seen provolone, muenster, or a decent wedge of smoked gouda. However, I still haven't been to a fromagerie so there's a chance I could find more there... French cheese is stinky..

Train hopping to different beaches in the summer

I completed my A1 French class in May and am looking forward to starting up again next month! I think I'll probably be in A2, while Nolan will be in B1. While I haven't found an in person job, there are still plenty things I've done since I've been here in France.

• Completed A1 level French class. Now I can tell people I speak a little French, instead of just saying "je ne parle pas français" (except, I still say that when I really don't want to talk to people......... sorry)

• Visited 4 new countries: the Netherlands (Amsterdam), Italy (Rome), the U.K. (London and Exeter), and of course France.

• Visited various different areas within France, including: Antibes, plateau de Calern, Cannes, Cassis, Avignon, Brittany, Nantes, Gap, Villefranche-sur-Mer, La Colle sur Loupe, and a few other cities that I can't remember the names of.

• Spent two months in the U.S. and went to New York City and Pittsburgh for the first time

• Backpacked for the first time (short hike in and out with camping gear! I never did that in Utah, which seems crazy to me now)

• Kayaked to and around the Isles de Lerins and the Calanques

• Led my first route in France, 5c/510.a! So proud of that one

• Had a wedding party!!

• Learned how to cook (or seriously improved my cooking)

• Attended my first European football (soccer) match

• Baked from French cookbooks

Living in France has been hard. I knew it was going to be, but I think the hardest part is that it's very isolating being so far away from your friends and family. I don't know if it's better or worse that I can keep up with people on social media, considering I can see some of what people are doing without having to talk to them much.

Nolan and I are moving into a new apartment October 1st. Long story short, we've had an ongoing mold problem in our current apartment and have been really unhappy with our living situation, so we are SO excited to move to a new place. At the end of October we'll go to Germany! I've been fortunate to follow Nolan around on his travels for different conferences he's attended. There are still a few other places I would like to visit, including Corsica, Spain, Switzerland, Scotland, Portugal, maybe Greece, and other cities within France and southern Italy. We'll see how much we can do in a short amount of time because... surprise, we plan on moving back to the U.S.A. once Nolan's work contract is over!! We're not sure exactly when, but sometime around the end of June 2023. We're also not sure where we'll go after that. Definitely to Texas to pick up all of our belongings from my parents' house.

For the rest of my time here in Europe, I'll continue working on the things I've been working on, including graphic design, baking, cooking, and learning how to speak French! I still occasionally looking for jobs I feel like I would enjoy and be qualified for with my lack of fluency in French, but unfortunately it's slim pickings. Any who, thinking of writing another post specifically with pictures and details of our travels through Europe. If you've stayed with me throughout this long post... thank you, I love you!

Best,